I just got this in an email forward. I’m sure most everyone has seen it before, but I hadn’t and I found it to be cute, pithy, and too truthful.
Jack goes quail hunting before school, pulls into school parking lot with shotgun in gun rack.
1958 - Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack’s shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.
2008 - School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.
1958 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.
2008 - Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.Jeffrey won’t be still in class, disrupts other students.
1958 - Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by the Principal. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.
2008 - Jeffrey given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADD. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.Billy breaks a window in his neighbor’s car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1958 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2008 - Billy’s dad is arrested for child abuse.. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy’s sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy’s mom has affair with psychologist.Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.
1958 - Mark shares aspirin with Principal out on the smoking dock.
2008 - Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.Pedro fails high school English.
1958 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.
2008 - Pedro’s cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action laws suit against state school system and Pedro’s English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant bed.
1958 - Ants die.
2008 - ATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, Johnny’s Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1958 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2008 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.
Web designer and developer. Loud discerner. Software engineer and 
Yeah, that’s just about it. Everybody is way too paranoid. There is some reason to it, people are being raised badly. Then the authorities have to put handicaps on the students to “protect” them, and these handicaps just result in them becoming worse people. Then we need new precautions to help our kids that will again hinder the kids. It’s sadly self-perpetuating.
My grandpa said that he would be able to go to school, put his gun in his locker IN THE SCHOOL, and then go hunting afterwards. My have things changed.
I think whoever wrote this forward has extensively exaggerated.
its true. america is to hyped up about terrorism, guys, osama binladen IS DEAD! we have yet to git contact from him. A sexual prededor is a guy that looks like a total pervert with a porno mag hanging out of his left pocket, NOT A damn teacher! america, pleze. once i rule you i WILL make shure you gi a good educaion. Idiotz.
One of my high school teachers told me about growing up in Maine and going hunting after school. When the pricipal found out the kids had guns in their trucks, he had the guns put in his office, not for security, but so that they would be protected from the elements.
@John3Sobieski
It is indeed self-perpetuating. Once you go down the nanny-state road there’s no going back. In Britain they are actually padding lampposts because people are walking into them while texting.
@Rachel
Yeah, but it’s the truth in the exaggerations that make it both funny and scary.
@Gladiator-666
That’s a very expressive sentiment you have there.
@Heather
I can appreciate respect for quality firearms. I’m not sure how people can reconcile the fact that back in “the day” when kids could readily bring firearms to school there weren’t any school shootings… but today kids are forbidden and school shootings are a problem… yet we’re supposed to believe nothing has changed (and in fact things have possibly improved?!).
That’s great!
This is the perfect post to comment on and make people painfully aware of the way things are. I hope you don’t mind if I make a small lecture here about some things Fr. Corapi preaches. Believe me, he has all kinds of good things to say.
Fr. Corapi, before his reconversion into the Catholic Faith (he was born Catholic but failed to practice his faith after he left home, but was later converted back) was a fully trained Green Beret, or some form of Army Special Forces. He was going to be sent to Veitnam, but was wounded in a helicopter accident before his deployment (good for him, every last man he trained with was killed in Veitnam). This gives him background and credibility when he talks about wars and military tactics.
Now, where would wars and military tactics come into effect in religion? Because the fight between God and the Devil is indeed a war. Several of the Devil’s tactics are described right here, in this post about the differences between 1958 and 2008. Thanks to my dad making us (me and my brothers and sister) watch Fr. Corapi every sunday night, I’ve been able to spot those tactics.
1) No single human has the skills and talents required of him to make it to heaven. We need others, we need to back each other up so that we can all make use of everybodies skills and talents and make it to heaven. But the Devil has sown distrust in the ranks of God’s Christian Soldiers on Earth (that’s us). Every 2008 problem described above either perpetuates distrust or is a result of distrust. In 2008, Jack is afraid to get close to the Vice Principal (or any form of authority) because he might get in trouble by letting the Principal in on his activities. That cuts off help he might get from the Principal to fight off temptation. Similiar things are true with Mark, Pedro, and the 2 last Johnny sections.
2) The second tactic I see here is the tearing apart of the dignity of the family. The family is the basic unit of society, tear it down and you can destroy any and all social institutions, including the Christian Churches. The attack on the family is evident in the part with Billy. With to much criticism riding on any mothers or fathers actions, they can become afraid of doing anything to restrain the actions of their children. Then, the children grow up to be bad people and become the Devil’s servants and not the Lord’s. Which brings me to one more point.
3) The Devil is interfering with the formation of children, which is evident in every section of the paper. He is stealing people for himself, enlarging his army, so that he can someday have a large enough army to strike down the Lord’s Army. Fortunately, we already know that the Devil will ultimately lose the struggle.
Please ask questions, I’ll explain things better if people ask things. I’m no Fr. Corapi, so the explanations won’t be as good as they ought to be, but I’m giving it my best shot.