Have you ever finished a news story with a totally different impression of the reported scenario than you started with? I did recently. I saw a headline saying “Wal-Mart turns away helper dog” in my local newspaper and I instantly pictured some old curmudgeonly “greeter” chasing away some little blind girl’s seeing-eye-”varmint”. But as I read on, it not only took the tone of a typical leftist Wal-Mart bashing piece, but it left no doubt that the situation wreaks of politically correct sewage. Read the beginning of the article below:
Wal-Mart turns away helper dog
Mother says rights of her daughter were violated; retailer says store’s employees to receive trainingWednesday, October 4, 2006 Page: B1
ALBANY - Some parents choose to stay quiet about their child’s mental illness, but not Michell Schilling. She has worked hard to make sure her son, who suffers from schizoaffective disorder, and her daughter, who suffers from bipolar disorder, don’t feel stigmatized. She’s not afraid to talk about their conditions and spends time doing research to make sure they know about the best therapies. Now the Esperance woman is alleging that a manager at the Crossgates Commons Wal-Mart infringed on her daughter’s rights over the weekend by refusing them access to shop in the store with her child’s young psychiatric service dog.
[...]
Sounds pretty clear that this dog should have been let in, right? Well… as I read the story I learned that this “young psychiatric service dog” is just a little puppy that she carries around solely for her bipolar disorder. That’s right, the creature is her living cheer-up toy. This dog hasn’t been trained to do anything except be a puppy… but by virtue of being a cute, furry animal it serves as her “helper”. So this otherwise normal looking little Mrs. Hyde tries to waltz into Wal-Mart with her poor furry prisoner and (of course) gets stopped. So then the mother gets all upset at mean ‘ole Wal-Mart infringing on her hellion’s rights to have her therapeutic canine with her at all times.
Now, without being insensitive or misunderstanding the “disorder”, can I ask a question? Why the heck did they give some crazy bipolar chick a puppy?! Are they crazy? [pardon the pun] Somebody call Canine Protective Services! This reminds me of Darla in Finding Nemo (a psycho girl who is given fish and promptly shakes them to death). How many tantrums has this little dog endured? I wonder how far she can throw him… hmmm…? *ponders*
And to top off the lunacy of this whole thing… the employees are going to get training now. Sensitivity training. I am so sick of hearing about sensitivity. We are politically correct pansies that have been wussified by the leftist tolerance movement (which is ironically one of the least tolerant movements in existence). If anything… we are WAY TOO sensitive. We should be putting people through “insensitivity training”, so that we can arrest the über-tolerance that is decaying their brains. We can imbue insensitivity through a strict regimen of offensive behavior. The training would probably look like the boot camp scene at the beginning of Full Metal Jacket, except with more shooting and swearing. They’d have to complete special missions, too… like slipping pork products into potluck dishes at mosques… and setting up public nativity scenes made of veal cutlets.
Before I go, here’s another question. From the story above we see this same mother has a son with “schizoaffective disorder”. Would it infringe on his rights if Wal-Mart refused to let him buy five of an item marked “Limit 1 per customer”?
Web designer and developer. Loud discerner. Software engineer and 
Ha ha, Steve. Good work again. Except…
Schizoaffective disorder (and schiziphrenia, too) is *completely* different from multiple personality disorder, which may be what your closing joke refers to?
More on schizoaffective disorder: http://www.nmha.org/infoctr/factsheets/52.cfm
I have a relative with this disorder and his main problems are paranoia and hallucinations. People with multiple personalities (aka “dissociative identity disorder”) have several distinct personalities within one body, usually as a result of trauma as a child (like sexual abuse).
*Thank you for listening to this public service announcement from your local therapist/mommy, Tara*
Argh! I hate it when I screw up.
Yeah, I saw the “schizo” and figured it was the multi-personality manner of disorder. Thanks for setting me straight!
this is funny stuff,
Steve, you kill me, you need to get your own show!
I say, do whatever you gotta do to keep the nutsos happy. If she has to carry a small dog around with her everywhere she goes, so be it. Whatever, if Toto stops her from shooting up a school, then I’m all for it.
A nice healthy dose of lithium would be cheaper and much more effective.
Good point about giving a dog to an unstable person. A stuffed toy would probably have done as well.
The ADA is poorly written and lends itself to wide abuse because of it’s many flaws.
lithium kills….whose rights did this puppy infringe upon lets here it….
I have mental illness and a service dog. My use of a service dog is covered under to federal ADA law. Good thing, too, since I can’t possibly go shopping without her. Denying her access is denying me access and this being America, you cannot do that.
Just as with a person, if the dog is disruptive, makes a mess, etc., the management have every right to require that the owner/handler remove the dog from the store.
Some mentally ill people cannot function even close to normally without a service dog.