I live in the socialist Northeast where any slightly critical remark that could be remotely interpreted as possibly applying to a specific culture or race is totally and extremely offensive — unless, of course, you’re poking fun at rednecks/Southerners (which to ignorant Northeasters are the same people), or Christians. Oh yes… up in the Northeast you can rip any folks with a Southern twang, and any Christians who actually believe what they say they believe, up one side and down the other… and it’s okay!?

Specifically, there are these so-called redneck jokes. These little gems get passed around in email just as much by fellow rednecks (getting a chuckle laughing at themselves) as by ignorant urban bigots sipping their pansy lattes. I think it says a lot about a race or culture when they can laugh at themselves, and I guess that means it says a lot about a race or culture that CANNOT laugh at themselves [you know who you are].

Anyways… in the vein of the proto-typical “You might be a redneck if…” I actually just received an email that put a new spin on this format. I’m repeating it here with my own personal touches and a few sharper barbs. Here goes…

You might be a redneck if…

• it never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase “one nation, under God”… or by seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places… or by hearing “Merry Christmas” instead of “Happy Winter Holiday”
• you bow your head when someone prays, and you don’t feel uncomfortable or ashamed when you they get to the “In Jesus’ name… Amen” part
• your music talks about hard work, being honest, and fighting for your country… more than it talks about selling drugs, hitting women, and committing murder
• you stand up straight (if able), remove your hat, and place your hand over your heart when you hear the National Anthem
• you treat our armed forces veterans with great respect, and always have
• you’ve never burned an American flag, never picketed a military recruiting center, and never shouted into the face of a policeman
• you know what you believe and you aren’t afraid to say so, no matter how many leftist censors are listening
• you raised your kids to respect their elders, say please and thank you, and own up to their own mistakes
• you’d give your last dollar to a friend… or drive your pickup over to help a neighbor… or deliver a veterans’ widow some dry firewood on a cold winter day… or fight a raging fire inside a stranger’s home

The truth of the matter is that if the United States had twice the rednecks it does… it’d be ten times the country it is.

Which reminds me of another redneck joke I received that I feel paints an accurate picture of that culture:

The Pentagon announced TODAY the formation of a new 500-man elite fighting unit called the United States Redneck Special Forces (USRSF).

[insert picture of rednecks holding ridiculously sized rifles]

These boys will be dropped off in Iraq and given only the following info on terrorists:

1. The season opened today
2. There is no limit
3. They taste just like chicken
4. They don’t like beer, pickups, country music or Jesus
5. They are directly responsible for the death of Dale Earnhardt

Can you find what’s so outrageously offensive in the above ad? Well, duh… of course it’s got to be the puppy. This little guy is Rebel, a German Shepherd police dog “recruit” who’s been featured recently on police fliers in the Scottish town of Tayside. Now the Muslims in the nearby Dundee community are outraged because of how offensive and insensitive this ad is. Huh?

The advert has upset Muslims because dogs are considered ritually unclean and has sparked such anger that some shopkeepers in Dundee have refused to display the advert. Dundee councilor Mohammed Asif said: ‘My concern was that it’s not welcomed by all communities, with the dog on the cards.’

WTF? Are you kidding me? The West has quite a love for canines, and dogs have also found worthy service in many parts of our society. So if you don’t like it perhaps you should go eat dog crap. Any shopkeeper from that town that refuses to put up that sign should be sentenced to community service cleaning the police kennel.

Seriously, anyone offended by a puppy should kill themselves. Really.

A spokesman for Tayside Police said: ‘Trainee police dog Rebel has proved extremely popular with children and adults since being introduced to the public, aged six weeks old, as Tayside Police’s newest canine recruit.’

[...]

‘We did not seek advice from the force’s diversity adviser prior to publishing and distributing the postcards. That was an oversight and we apologise for any offence caused.’

Why is this wimp apologizing?! A puppy is not offensive… so if someone decides they are offended by it, who the heck cares? Good! I’m glad they are offended. Perhaps being offended will help them out… in a therapeutic way. Maybe I’ll draw a cartoon featuring Muhammad the Sheltie - it can be my weekly comic in their Sunday paper.

This whole brain-scraper is the typical, wreaking, leftist, multiculturalistic approach to social appeasement… bereft of any principles or logical thought. If you took their “tolerance” and “sensitivity” to its logical conclusion (oops, that takes thought) the town would ultimately have to remove all dogs, including police dogs, as to not offend any Muslims. After that all non-mosques would have to be torn down, too, because they are filled with infidel swine. Oh yeah… all pork products should be pulled from the store shelves.

You see… I’m spun up now.

Well, all the kids are currently back with their parents. Now we can actually try using due process rather than fascism… what a novel thought!?

During the conversation I ran into Ashleigh, a 21-yr-old schoolgirl who seemed full of inexperience and strong opinions. For example, she touted environmental responsibility - and indeed wanted everyone to learn a “deeper understanding of poverty” that would permeate their lifestyle choices like what car they drive… yet later admitted that she herself drives an SUV (so much for that “deeper understanding”). Even better… in her blog she recently posted that this carton right here is racist (!?) and she wants people to contact the editors of Christianity Today to “firmly let them know this is not acceptable” (wait ’till you actually see the “racist” cartoon).

Anyways… I engaged this girl in attempted logical discourse - which, for your entertainment, I have included here. My discussion responses are in normal text, my reflective commentary for you is in italics, and some highlighting has been added by me for emphasis.

The Discussion

Ashleigh:

[...] I appreciated the Earth Day snippet, but I also thought it was rather wimpy. It seemed to focus only on “People in the U.S. have too much food,” when in reality, that’s not the biggest problem as far as how the U.S. contributes to environmental degradation. [...] U.S. Americans are so deeply entrenched in an economic system that exploits the poor, and most of them don’t even know it. There are so many ways to continue expanding sponsors’ understanding of poverty that will impact their whole lives (what kind of house and neighborhood they live in, who they vote for, what they drive, where they shop, etc.) [...] I do understand that you will need to restrain your critiques at points– honestly, not all people are ready for them. [...]

Oh boy, a lefty… and a quick check to her blog reveals she’s only 21 and appears to still be in college… yet seems to know so much about “U.S. Americans” and their lack of all her good qualities. Here I go.

@ Ashleigh
I find your comments offensive.

I’m not sure how much of the world you’ve seen (or even if you’re out of school yet), but the United States (and the West in general) is a gold-standard of environmental goodness next to the rest of the planet. The countries that Compassion helps are often huge polluters and it’s only with the help of the US and the West (including the people you call “deeply entrenched in an economic system that exploits the poor”) that Compassion can keep doing what it’s doing for the poor.

We don’t need finger-pointing at Compassion’s generous sponsors - obviously they already must have some “understanding of poverty” to be a sponsor in the first place.

If transparency means that this blog is just going to be about bashing the United States then the superficial marketing style of blog is looking pretty good.

Ashleigh:

Interesting thoughts, Steve. I’m sorry you were offended by my comments. Let me try to clarify:

While I agree that other countries contribute to pollution, most people don’t have cars, multiple TVs, computer, etc. like we do here. Compared with the rest of the world, the carbon footprint of those of us in the U.S. is huge! I agree that we need better environmental standards across the board, but in many areas the U.S. trails behind other advanced industrialized nations in leading the way. For example, the U.S. decided not to sign in on the Kyoto Protocol.

Similar situations exist not only as far as environmental issues go but in a multitude of areas. The U.S. has pushed forward a lot of positive progress in the world, but it is not squeaky clean. There are points at which the U.S. government or businesses have quite intentionally taken advantage of others. All countries do this– not just the U.S. The U.S. just happens to be a position of power, so complaints are rarely heard.

I am not saying bitter finger-pointing is the answer, just that a lot more than $32/month is required if we really want to take on global poverty. Poverty is a complex problem to solve even when everyone wants to solve it. (That’s why economists like William Easterly and Jeffrey Sachs argue with each other about the best way to move forward!) We all always have more to learn, and there may be some very large changes individuals, institutions, and governments of many countries, including the U.S., must make if we are all to do our part.

Yeah, first of all I’m glad we didn’t sign Kyoto. Second, by “the U.S. government or businesses” do you mean businesses like the neighborhood pub? Or more like the local tattoo parlor? Or perhaps you are referring to some big, straw-man, evil corporation business led by a fat, white, male, cigar-smoking, suit-wearing, yacht-sailing CEO having his shoes polished by Mexicans… you know, the guy your liberal professors constantly harp about?

Before I could even address the politics of her post someone beat me to it.

Jore Lund:

We accept that there is much diversity of opinion on topics outside of the ones that bring us together. We choose to “prefer on another in love” and not focus on differences that could result in divisiveness.

This does result in some holding of the tongue, but it is worth it. I love to see liberal Democrats and conservative Republicans working side by side in obedience to Christ. Frankly, the process of laboring together with those of different opinions than my own, while respecting each other, has done more to alter my views than any sort of verbal banter.

If this blog becomes a location for knock-down, drag-out discussions of controversial topics then I think we are eroding something precious.

Compassion’s purpose is not to create a hot-bed of social discourse. As one wise Compassion friend taught me; we are trying to help people see Christ in the children that are living in poverty, and give them an opportunity to be Christ to these children.

So as we try to push the outside of the envelope, let’s not rip the paper.

@ Jore
Well spoken. I think we can credibly have a fulfilling and Christ-honoring discourse here (despite our varied ideologies and perspectives) if we leave the politics and student activism out of it. There are plenty of blogs for that.

Ashleigh:

I don’t think we’ve really gotten into politics.

Is simply admitting that the U.S. isn’t perfect (nor is any other country) so political? People sin against each other, and I think it’s important to remain open to confronting and confessing sin as necessarily. Nehemiah confessed on behalf of his Israelite ancestors– is it inappropriate for us to do the same?

She’s really backpedaling at this point. Apparently ALL she did was admit “that the U.S. isn’t perfect”, and even the Bible says that America isn’t perfect. I’ll make sure to remember in the future that if I say anything offensive it’s merely me pointing out that nobody’s perfect. Anyways, despite indications of leftist retardation I’m going to try and help her.

@ Ashleigh
I think that there is a line between honest self-critique and politically charged rhetoric. For instance, saying “Americans are so deeply entrenched in an economic system that exploits the poor” is wholly leftist and is not only political, but (in my opinion) is painfully erroneous. Although it may further Obama’s kingdom… it doesn’t further God’s kingdom, which is why we’re here.

With regard to Compassion’s generous sponsors: Have you ever been to a church on a Sunday night where the preacher was scolding his church for its shabby Sunday night attendance? The trouble is… he’s yelling at the wrong people! Don’t be too quick to convict the $32/month sponsor when you don’t know what else they’re doing (besides their support of Compassion) to further His kingdom.

You’ve got energy and spirit and I don’t want to mute that… only to help you channel it to maximize your positive effect on your circle of influence.

Ashleigh:

Steve,
I majored in political science and took a class on international political economy. Though you may disagree with my opinions (and opinions they are), they are valid views and not inherently anti-Christian as you seem to imply. My concern is for the poor, a concern which plays a pivotal role in God’s kingdom, though I realize people have different ideas of the best means by which to help the poor. I would appreciate it if you would refrain the from unsubstantiated bashing of certain political identities without even knowing if I claim them as my own.

I am not in any way trying to say Compassion sponsors aren’t generous people. I just know that in my own life, $32 is only so significant. I am still struggling to understand how I can truly give up my white U.S. American privilege that others might be blessed. $32 is a step for me, too, but I feel called to something higher than that. I think it’s important for us to wrestle with what it means to love the poor beyond simply offering a monthly donation, even one that is heartfelt.

I feel I can speak to this part of the Compassion sponsor experience because I am one, and I know what a struggle it is to truly integrate values of compassion and justice into one’s everyday life. It’s a journey I’m not finished with.

I appreciate your kindly meant closing, but that, when combined with your earlier remarks about my guessed age feel patronizing.

Maybe we can continue to discuss the ideas behind my original post rather than the specifics? I essentially said, (1) Compassion isn’t perfect and should be upfront and (2) the U.S. isn’t perfect and should be upfront. I don’t know how anyone could argue that either of these entities are perfect (even if you believe they’re mostly good!). Do people agree that an important part of this blog’s role would be engage with difficult issues like the struggles of both Compassion and the U.S. to bless the world’s poor with integrity?

Ok, I burst out laughing when I read how she’s majoring “in political science and took a class on international political economy”. With merely a few credit hours of study she’s been transformed into a global economist!! Good Father in Heaven, its a miracle!!

Notice that my mention of Obama is “bashing” to her… which is precisely why everyone should be really bashed in any form at some point in their life - so that our bash-o-meters are calibrated and don’t register false positives. She also seemed taken aback that I would insinuate she supports Obama without knowing for sure - apparently her own blog post using phrases like “my dear Barack” surrounded by near-romantic politi-gah-gah isn’t conclusive.

Still, I’m going to try and help her…

@ Ashleigh,
Ahh, much better… hardly any political rhetoric this time.

Did you notice that your latest comment centered around _your_ own experiences, struggles, and challenges in reflecting Christ to the poor… whereas your earlier comment seemed to center around what _others_ were or were not doing? Do you see the fundamental difference in the way it reads and the perceived attitude?

And while the US and the West definitely have their issues governmentally, open critique seems to be a bit beyond the scope of this blog (although any moderators are free at any time to tell me to go jump in a polluted third-world lake). Although, we can always write our elected officials and let them know our feelings regarding upcoming legislation, current events, and foreign policy. Perhaps a good blog post might be about about just that.

I actually like what Chris was saying the best with regard to the blog “having a blend of posts that run the gamut from promotional, to informational, to educational with some being silly, others being serious, some asking questions and others answering questions”.

Ashleigh:

Steve,
Thanks for your thoughts, but I’d appreciate you let me be my own editor. I’m an adult that can take responsibility for my own thoughts and expressions; I don’t take back my initial comments, nor did I write these later ones in an attempt to please you. As I stated before, despite your good intentions, these kinds of questions and comments are patronizing and hurtful.

If you would like to respond to the new questions/ideas I presented, feel free.

Thanks,
Ashleigh

The Conclusion

*sigh* Poor Ashleigh.

The real hero here is her little brother, who was able to leverage his father’s preoccupation, his sister’s hysteria, and the overall commotion to courageously capture the whole event on video the viral marketing warriors across the electric ether.

Have you ever heard the expression “better to be thought a fool and remain silent, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt?” Well, lest you think that this girl’s initial reaction was a caught-in-the-moment, out-of-character, knee-jerk, emotionally-charged reaction to what was a wonderful gift… she was kind enough to record a video response that removes any doubt she is indeed a spoiled, self-absorbed whore-child an actress!?

I’m heartened that this particular set of videos cannot be used as evidence of mankind’s decay (being staged and all), but here’s one that (purportedly) can:

After all the blah-blah the mainstream media windbags have gassed out, I’m left pondering this whole thing. I remember the Waco Massacre and how our government burned alive 76 people, including 21 children and two pregnant women. Now, if you think I’m going to condone any of those Waco nuts, or any of the recent polygamy and child-marriage, you can rest easy - I’m not. However, bigger issues and ethical dilemmas arise.

For instance, what exactly justifies the government removing confiscating kidnapping over 400 children based on one anonymous call from a purported young girl at this ranch? I mean, shouldn’t they first investigate, find this girl, and THEN legally deal with HER parents only (at least initially)? Can you imagine if someone in your church had abused their children, and because of it all the children in your church - including YOUR children - were taken away by the government and prepped for foster care? Where’s the due process?

Another thing that bugs me is that this would NEVER have happened if it were a Muslim ranch… not in today’s politically correct mire where politicians are stumbling over each other to kiss any large potential voting block’s collective arse.

Perhaps the biggest incongruity I struggle with here is the illogical, irrational, and imbalanced “shock” and “outrage”. I’m talking about “outrage” over a 50-yr-old man marrying a 14-yr-old girl - yet if a 50-yr-old man had instead carved out the girl’s brain at birth, then that’s okay. I’m talking about “shock” that a man would have two wives, but two gay men existing as co-husbands is okay. Polygamy is just an organized and religious “marriage” version of what’s already going on in our inner-cities in a very non-marriage and non-religious context.

Quite frankly, America’s (and Britain’s) inner-cities have sorta become an urban underage-illegitimacy farm where poorly-raised girls of single mothers copulate with multiple poorly-raised boys of single mothers and produce multiple babies by multiple fathers (that we foot the bill for, of course). These children would be better off with polygamist parentssss who are more stable, more nurturing, and wait at least until puberty to whore out wed their daughters… yet it’s the Texas ranch folks who got their kids taken away. [Two great books to read more about inner-city "nurturing" and illegitimacy are Freakonomics by Steven Levitt, and Marriage and Caste In America by Kay Hymowitz]

So I’m troubled a bit. I’m troubled that we’re on a slippery slope and nobody cares enough about some pioneer-dress wearing simple folk to at least raise an eyebrow. I’m raising my eyebrow… and curious to see how this turns out in the next few weeks.

So the Dutch politician Geert Wilders demonstrates some sac - and a little thing called free speech - by releasing a short-film titled Fitna, which means “division among peoples”. The film is a montage. It includes verses from the Qur’an (Koran, Currahn, Cor-anne, Quho’ron, Koh-ron’n???) that could be taken out of context to incite violence against non-Muslims. Interspersed with these verses are scenes from the media that you’d have to be a cave troll to have missed… cowardly acts of Islamist terrorism (September 11 attacks, Madrid train bombings, etc.)… Muslim children calling Jews “pigs”… Muslim clerics calling for death to Jews and Westerners… you get the idea - just the usual. [please don't confuse the clerics with Barack Obama's pastor... although they're close]

So I watched the film. The premise - that the Qur’an is being used (to some extent) in fueling hatred and violence in the name of Islam - seemed to be well demonstrated (proven?). Indeed, the point seems grossly obvious to anyone with a television. Sadly the point is in dispute. Violently in dispute. Violently in dispute?! Isn’t that a double-negative or a oxy-contradiction? Fortunately I didn’t need the film to see that Islam isn’t always very… umm… “peaceful”? And where would I get that idea?

Remember the cartoons? Remember the Pope’s remarks? This recent brouhaha over Fitna has firmly established a grave pattern… that the very right to free speech can be removed - under threat from an extremist mob - when you have pansies in leadership.

From a Reuters article:

U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon on Friday condemned as “offensively anti-Islamic” a Dutch lawmaker’s film that accuses the Koran of inciting violence.

Ban acknowledged efforts by the government of the Netherlands to stop the broadcast of the film, which was launched by Islam critic Geert Wilders over the Internet, and appealed for calm to those “understandably offended by it.”

“There is no justification for hate speech or incitement to violence,” Ban said in a statement. “The right of free expression is not at stake here.”

Did you read that? The UN Figurehead says that “The right of free expression is not at stake here”!? That there is no justification for this? How about no justification for answering an insult with violence? How about no justification for responding to a cartoon with killings? You see… the UN Figurehead knows that there are a small number of Muslims who are wild extremist animals - unfortunately a small percentage of a billion people is still A LOT OF PEOPLE! So instead of acknowledging the problem he jumps down the throat of the guy revealing the problem. Isn’t that just like today’s world leadership?

From a Breitbart article:

An Internet site said Saturday it had removed anti-Islam film “Fitna” by far-right Dutch MP Geert Wilders after receiving threats to its staff amid protests by Muslim nations and the UN chief.

The Britain-based Liveleak.com said it pulled down the video, which can still be seen on other websites, including youtube.com. The film was posted to the Internet on Thursday.

“Following threats to our staff of a very serious nature, and some ill informed reports from certain corners of the British media that could directly lead to the harm of some of our staff, Liveleak.com has been left with no other choice but to remove ‘Fitna’ from our servers,” the site said in a statement.

“This is a sad day for freedom of speech on the net but we have to place the safety and well being of our staff above all else,” the online statement said.

Wilders said it was “terrible that these threats deal a serious blow to freedom of expression,” but he told Dutch news agency ANP that he understood the decision to withdraw the short film.

So here’s the ploy… threaten the providers of the medium, and scare them into silence. Fortunately, in this case, LiveLeak.com ended up putting the video back up - I give them points for that. And really, this is what it takes. It takes standing up to the threats and the violence. It takes standing strong and saying that being offended is okay… you’ll survive.

I would be remiss here not to mention that although there are a small percentage of Muslims who are Satan incarnate, there are also a small percentage who are disgusted by the sickening and irrational animal displays of the former group. These are the Free Muslims, and you should read more about them.

And actually, another Muslim group that watches extremists - Islam Watch - recently uncovered some extremism that was just covered here in this FoxNews article:

A report posted on Islam Watch, a site run by Muslims who oppose intolerant teachings and hatred for unbelievers, exposes a prominent Islamic cleric and lawyer who support extreme punishment for non-Muslims — including killing and rape.

A question-and-answer session with Imam Abdul Makin in an East London mosque asks why Allah would tell Muslims to kill and rape innocent non-Muslims, including their wives and daughters, according to Islam Watch.

“Because non-Muslims are never innocent, they are guilty of denying Allah and his prophet,” the Imam says, according to the report. “If you don’t believe me, here is the legal authority, the top Muslim lawyer of Britain.”

The lawyer, Anjem Choudary, backs up the Imam’s position, saying that all Muslims are innocent.

Click here to watch the interview with Islamic lawyer Anjem Choudary.

“You are innocent if you are a Muslim,” Choudary tells the BBC. “Then you are innocent in the eyes of God. If you are not a Muslim, then you are guilty of not believing in God.”

Choudary said he would not condemn a Muslim for any action.

Anyways… without further prattle… here’s the Fitna short-film (courtesy of LiveLink courtesy of Google Video):

SUPER-QUICK SUMMARY

The Golden Compass (the movie) is a great story captured in a well-made cinematic fantasy-scape that I enjoyed, and I found it fairly benign for kids despite the emails warning of impending doom. The book series that the movie comes from, however, is not as innocent. Although aimed at kids, it’s not nearly as kid-appropriate as the movie, and decreases so from book to book (as does the quality of the storytelling).

THE MOVIE

I thought the movie itself was well worth seeing. The special effects were impressive, although I have become numb to great CGI after the Lord of the Rings film trilogy’s mastery of the device. I also thought the casting was splendid - with a very demure and poised Nicole Kidman and a very wild western Sam Elliot (who is one of my faves). The little girl playing the lead character Lyra was Dakota Blue Richards, who in her first ever movie role managed to encapsulate the Lyra character almost identically to my perception of her from reading the book prior… impressive.

For everything negative about the books you may read in this post, keep in mind that I don’t apply that to the movie. The only caution would be if seeing the movie may lure your kids into reading the books… books you may find inappropriate.

THE CONTROVERSY

Now for the controversy - I have been sent emails that warn me to not give any “support” to this movie and to warn every parent I know to keep their children far away from this movie. That’s really quite overblown. The emails also warn that there are clearly anti-church, anti-Christian themes in the books. That’s quite TRUE.

Though, let me interject here that with the thousands of people involved in the business of movies (from making to marketing to merchandising) there does not exist a blockbuster movie whose ticket revenue doesn’t support someone evil somewhere… so if you don’t want to give “support” to anything evil join an Amish community.

Anyways, this controversy is SOMEWHAT similar to the clamor over the Harry Potter books… and although I haven’t read any Potter I have enjoyed the movies and thought them harmless fun. Despite the outcry that Harry Potter would swoon young children into a dangerous curiosity with witchcraft, the reality is that young children long for the flying broomsticks, scaled dragons, magic wands (that shoot lightning), and fairy creatures - these things are not only part of Harry Potter, but are largely found in The Lord of the Rings and The Chronicles of Narnia. But REAL witchcraft is more like mixing a special hot tea to get that promotion you’re looking for, or drawing a circle in the dirt and standing in it to imagine the face of your soul-mate, and no kid is interested in such “mundane” witchcraft.

THE BOOKS

In PARTLY the same way as Harry Potter or The Chronicles of Narnia, The Golden Compass is a children’s story rich in creatures, magic, compassion, oppression. HOWEVER, the book series (His Dark Materials) does go way beyond the generic “good versus evil” tale. There are clear counter-Biblical messages which the author does not deny.

Now the counter-Biblical messages in His Dark Materials can be compared to The Da Vinci Code, except that the latter was never meant for children, and adults would see it as readily filled with enough historical nonsense that there was no semblance of truth to be mistook (at least not by anyone intelligent). But kids are much more innocent and impressionable, and there are indeed - in His Dark Materials - specific counter-Biblical messages found directly in the storyline… it is very subtle in the first book, more open in the second, and blatantly obvious in the third. In fact, the third book’s dialog holds messages that would surely confuse impressionable young Christian children.

From what I’ve read online the author of His Dark Materials, Philip Pullman, is a self-assigned Atheist and decided to write His Dark Materials as a sort-of counter-Narnia story. Pullman would have done better to just write a solid epic children’s story, because although the first book is great, he starts to meander into an amalgam of preachy open-ended bunny trails that bear little resemblance to the exciting start of the tale. Indeed, the further you read the more convoluted (and counter-Biblical) the message gets - until the end of the third book when the reader is doused in a horrid yawn-fest of anti-climax.

If you are looking for an Atheist children’s story complete with homosexual fallen angels, pre-teen main characters who have sex with each other, and “God’s” military general of Heaven’s army getting horny for Nicole Kidman… then this is your book series.

Here is a great critique of the book series: His Dark Ending by James Schellenberg.

Here is an Amazon customer’s rant about the book series… it reads like something I would write.

I regularly read Worship Leader Magazine (WLM) and have always been a bit disappointed at the lack of articles on the importance of skill in worship music (an aspect that my worship hero Paul Baloche emphasizes in every one of his instructional videos). Not only importance… but if you read your Bible right - necessity.

I always thought WLM “intentionally” skimped on the “skill” thing merely because it was intuitively obvious… because it was considered a given in any serious worship circles. But recently, they did indeed include an article on skill in worship - amply titled “Play Skillfully” - which just might have revealed an alternate motive for their sparse coverage of skill in music… political correctness. You see, the author Mark Roberts openly admits in the article that pointing out the Bible’s call to skillful performance of worship may upset a lot of people. What? Why? It shouldn’t. Really, it shouldn’t.

When you are putting someone in a position (like in front of a church leading them in the worship of an all-powerful deity) you really should be using appropriate people. For leading worship music - appropriate people probably are those who have three things: some threshold of talent, the right attitude about the responsibility of leading others in worship, and spiritually a right heart. [for the non-churchy folk I apologize for not explaining the "right heart" thing here]

However, common sense applies always. Common sense tells us that kids in a church Christmas program (short of Joseph fist-fighting with the wise men) are afforded much leeway and may not have any of the three things listed above, and that’s okay. Common sense tells us that smaller churches need to play the cards they’re dealt, even if it’s just Queen high. And I’m sure everyone can think of real-life, sincere, and appropriate exemptions to my skill manifesto. But I do know that even the most modestly-skilled musicians and singers can work on their craft to pursue excellence. Indeed, the pursuit of excellence is sometimes more telling to me about worship music ministry than the act of already being excellent.

Anyways, to show my support of pro-skill articles I wrote a letter to the WLM editor voicing my approval, and as “always” my letter was delicate in a chiropractic sort of way.

Thank you for Dr. Mark Roberts’ article titled “Play Skillfully”. I found it quite refreshing to have some emphasis placed on this vital, yet seemingly ignored aspect of an excellent worship ministry. I’ve long felt that even enlightened worship resources like Worship Leader Magazine softball this issue too often.

Today’s churches, despite the modern infusion of quality worship music, seemingly regard “a servant’s heart” and “a humble walk” as the only true prerequisites for music ministry. This is simply wrong, un-Biblical, and could even be sinful if practiced negligently (whether intentionally or not). For the same reason that musical ability alone - without a desire for a Christ-likeness - would be insufficient for ministry, a lack of pursuit of musical excellence in a team member or worship leader, and an apathetic stance by church leadership, is a dereliction of our duty to worship the Lord as if he REALLY IS the creator of all things.

Now of course we have to use some common sense in application. Not all churches have the same selection of talent within their congregations - and in any team environment there are times when the “second-stringers” need to be put in the game to gain the skill and experience they need. But nothing changes the fact that pursuit of excellence in music ministry - or in any aspect of our worship - is part of the local church’s pursuit of Christ.

We wouldn’t settle for merely “a great prayer life” as qualification for a brain surgeon. We wouldn’t settle for just “a solid spiritual walk” as sufficient training for an electrician. So why compromise in our worship music ministry?

For those not aware, these videos are in the genre of the recent Apple commercials featuring conversations between a “hip” looking guy as a Mac and a rotund Bill Gates look-alike as a PC. The two new videos below both mirror existing Apple ads almost exactly… and they’re funny, too.

Being from Western New York, and solidly in “Bills Country”, I and everyone else in my hometown know exactly where we were the fateful Sunday afternoon of January, 1993. When I get together with my High School buds we still speak of the day in hushed whispers of reverent awe.

It was great to hear Frank Reich speak and to the shake the man’s hand. He’s a strong man of God and a Buffalo legend.

Now, I’ll be the first to say that sometimes Jerry said some wacky things that made it harder for me to be credible in my culture as a Christ-follower… but when taken in the context of all people, and even all Christians, he was near the top of the food chain with the big dogs. Even if I didn’t agree with him on everything (which I didn’t), I still agree with him on much more than I agree with most other clowns on TV.

There’s an Armenian proverb that says “The dogs that fight each other will join forces against the wolf.” The people and political organizations that hated Jerry the most are the ones that *I* hate the most… and that makes Jerry and me dawgs. So Dr. Falwell, rest in peace.

The blessing of the bar isn’t a pagan ritual, nor is the bar (called The Taproom) unholy in some inherent way. In fact, since Terra Nova Church meets right next door it is a great spot for us Terra Nova types to gather. Some of us even meet there once a month for Theology at the Taproom. The folks at The Taproom are our neighbors and Ed Marcelle would readily call it an honor to call God’s rich blessing down upon a great gathering place with great ales. There are many principles at work here, but I think chief among them is the calling to affect our culture. This is a clear Biblical command and articulated most clearly in Mark Driscoll’s outstanding book The Radical Reformission.

Inevitably, there’ll always be the chorus of legalists, isolationists, and curmudgeonly saints who invoke one of many false dogmas to not-so-nicely disparage this “blessing of the bar”. To these confused folk either the ale is evil, or the bar is evil, or the people in the bar are evil… blah blah blah. Whatever. I can’t help but want to suggest they read a Bible in their own language for a change of pace (yes, that was a subtle KJV dig).

Anyways, without further blabber, here is the video from the St. Patty’s Day 2007 blessing of the bar by Ed Marcelle. I wouldn’t have missed this anti-legalistic pilgrimage for anything… I was there on the second floor and you can hear me in the video yell “MARCELLE!” when he is introduced.

Dear Children,

It has come to my attention that many of you are upset that folks are taking My name out of the season. Maybe you’ve forgotten that I wasn’t actually born during this time of the year and that it was some of your predecessors who decided to celebrate My birthday on what was actually a time of pagan festival. Although, I don’t mind… I appreciate being remembered anytime.

How I personally feel about this celebration can probably be most easily understood by those of you who have been blessed with children of your own. I don’t care what you call the day. If you want to celebrate My birth feel free to do so at any time by showing love to others as I have shown Love to you.

Now, having said that let Me go on. If it bothers you that the town in which you live doesn’t allow a scene depicting My birth, then just get rid of a couple of Santas and snowmen and put in a small Nativity scene on your own front lawn. If all My followers did that there wouldn’t be any need for such a scene on the town square because there would be many of them all around town.

Stop worrying about the fact that people are calling the tree a holiday tree, instead of a Christmas tree. It was I who made all trees. You can remember Me anytime you see any tree. Decorate a grape vine if you wish: I actually spoke of that one in a teaching, explaining who I am in relation to you and what each of our tasks were. If you have forgotten that one, look up John 15:1-8.

If you want to give Me a present in remembrance of My birth here is my wish list. Choose something from it:

1. Instead of writing protest letters objecting to the way My birthday is being celebrated, write letters of love and hope to soldiers away from home. They are terribly afraid and lonely this time of year. I know, they tell Me all the time.

2. Visit someone in a nursing home. You don’t have to know them personally. They just need to know that someone cares about them.

3. Instead of writing George complaining about the wording on the cards his staff sent out this year, why don’t you write and tell him that you’ll be praying for him and his family this year. Then follow up. It will be nice hearing from you again.

4. Instead of giving your children a lot of gifts you can’t afford and they don’t need, spend time with them. Tell them the Story of My birth, and why I came to live with you down here. Hold them in your arms and remind them that I love them.

5. Pick someone that has hurt you in the past and forgive him or her.

6. Did you know that someone in your town will attempt to take their own life this season because they feel so alone and hopeless? Since you don’t know who that person is, try giving everyone you meet a warm smile it could make the difference.

7. Instead of nit picking about what the retailer in your town calls the holiday, be patient with the people who work there. Give them a warm smile and a kind word. Even if they aren’t allowed to wish you a “Merry Christmas” that doesn’t keep you from wishing them one.

8. If you really want to make a difference, support a missionary, especially one who takes My love and Good News to those who have never heard My name.

9. Here’s a good one. There are individuals and whole families in your town who not only will have no “Christmas” tree, but neither will they have any presents to give or receive. If you don’t know them, buy some food and a few gifts and give them to the Salvation Army or some other charity which believes in Me and they will make the delivery for you.

10. Finally, if you want to make a statement about your belief in and loyalty to Me, then behave like a Christian. Don’t do things in secret that you wouldn’t do in My presence Let people know by your actions that you are one of mine.

Don’t forget; I am God and can take care of Myself. Just love Me and do what I have told you to do. I’ll take care of all the rest. Check out the list above and get to work; time is short. I’ll help you, but the ball is now in your court. And do have a most blessed Christmas with all those whom you love.

I LOVE YOU,
JESUS

Well, much to my amusement the Community Christian Church has made a collection of videos to illustrate this point in the genre of the lovable Mac vs. PC commercials.

Now, as much as I’d like to think that people can take a joke and have a little fun, a cursory Google search revealed that dissension surrounds these videos within the “Christian” community. While many, like myself, get a big kick out of the clever and humorous way the actors make their point using a current, relevant spoof… others of the more “traditional” folk who fervently embrace their Christian label think that these videos send a dangerous message and are deceptive. What?!? Are you friggin’ serious?

Enjoy!

Thankfully, the resurgence of microbrewing in the United States is helping to overcome the great loss and to resurrect the art of brewing. I personally long for the return to the glory days of Christian pubs where God’s men gather to drink beer and talk theology.
- Mark Driscoll, The Radical Reformission

Now, many Protestant Christian churches in America have been near-continually lying to their congregations for almost a century about what the Bible says on wine and alcohol. They deny that Christ both made and drank wine with his apostles despite overwhelming scriptural evidence. Not until fairly recently in US history has the newer church generation been mature and powerful enough to start casting out the feminism-driven romance with prohibitionism (alcohol is sin) and abstentionism (it’s not a sin but Christians should abstain) that has been perpetuated by “nearly-false” prophets. To be fair, not EVERYONE preaching such blasphemy does so from a Satanic heart… some are merely ignorant or mentally blocked by their legalistic upbringing… but never-the-less it is a sin to declare a sin something that is not.

Diligently do everything I command you, the way I command you: don’t add to it; don’t subtract from it.
- Deuteronomy 12:32 (The Message Bible)

It never ceases to amaze me how anyone (even people trying to pass off as Christ-followers) will re-write and re-interpret history and scripture to suit their own purposes. I’ve expanded on such in my previous post Chardonnay and Lean Pockets. Here’s a link regarding what the Bible says about alcohol [LINK] and a link that even specifically addresses Jesus drinking beer [LINK]. And yet another link on the history of beer in the Christian-influenced world [LINK].

If self-righteousness were an art form, many Protestants’ work would be in the Guggenheim!
- Brad Stine

Here is a little history refresher (taken from The Radical Reformission by Mark Driscoll) that I like to bring up every now and then:

• Saint Gall was a missionary to the Celts and a renowned brewer
• After Charlemagne’s reign, the church became Europe’s exclusive brewer
• When a young woman was preparing for marriage, her church brewed a special bridal ale, from which we derive the word bridal
• Pastor John Calvin’s annual salary included upwards of 250 gallons of wine to be enjoyed by him and his guests
• Martin Luther once wrote of the Reformation, “While I sat still and drank beer with Philip and Amsdorf, God dealt the papacy a mighty blow.”
• Luther’s wife Catherine was a skilled brewer, and his love letters to her when they were apart lamented his inability to drink her beer
• When the Puritans landed at Plymouth Rock, the first permanent structure they erected was a brewery

It is a striking truth how scarce the above facts are within Protestant sermons in the US. And as if our myopic faith had no limit to its hypocrisy… our “teachers” often neglect the fellow brothers and sisters in Christ across the ocean who live in cultures not plagued by relics of abstentionism and having no temptation to re-write the Bible. They regularly drink beer and wine with such Christ-given freedom that American visitors from legalistic backgrounds often express great shock and discomfort, a testament to the false doctrine they were force fed from birth.

Some Methodist minister by the name of Welch invents grape juice in 1869 to replace communion wine and we’ve been suckling it ever since.
- Steve Mooradian

I’m no liberal Christian… I’m a politically conservative, theologically fundamental Christ-follower who happens to drink beer and worship in blue jeans playing electric guitar. And now I will brew… but with so many choices of fine ales and lagers I am left to ask myself… what would Jesus brew?